You can not make everybody like you

January 06, 2018

Photo by Mike Wilson on Unsplash

Hi buddy. How was your day? Hope you can meet nice people to talk with. Oh yes, I forgot, happy new year. We wish this year it's going better than yesterday, okay?


I should write about resolution or the new me thing because it still new year-vibe. But 2018 just a number, right? So what's the point? You do not have to change yourself into something new just because of the new year. You can change better now or tomorrow, not just because it's 2018.

I have another story. I can give you a fact that, you can not make everybody like you. Even though you think you already do the best, but back again, you can not control what people likes and assume about things.

It's just same as the desire to make other people happy. You've done your best but the person you want to be happy with, does not feel that way. 

I have a friend, she always give me a gift on my birthday. First, she gave me a wallet. Next year, she gave me a dress. She expect I like the gift, right? But...that wallet and dress was not really my type. So I never use it just keep it until now. Where is the fault? Can you explain this? Me and her, we are both innocent.

Your work was good. Great performance and massive clients. But your boss doesn't like you. 

You prepare your thesis very well. But when you present it to examiner, they don't like your thesis and need revised.

You like someone. You already try hard to make your self love-able, but people who you like doesn't feel the same.

Why?

Why it can be happen? Am I that bad? Ugly? But why?

You know,

stop

thinking

about why.

You never know the reason why. The more you search for the why, the more negative thoughts blame you. You'll think you're the one, you're the less, you're the one to blame. But it is not.

Because what determines person likes something or not, is feeling. And feeling is subjective, it can not be measured. You can not impose other feelings as you wish.

So, what can I do?

Instead of thinking about 'why' they doesn't like you, you just focus on what awaits you in the future. Close your ears with both hands. Put your step forward and let those who do not like you stay behind.

"It's okay. It just a bad day. He doesn't like me, so what? Get over it."

I can say you can not force others to like you. But I never forbid you to do your best. 

"You can't make everybody love you. It's an exercise in futility, and it's probably not even a good idea to try. " -- Robert Crumb

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